Defeat and rough days

We all have those days and weeks of complete defeat and every turn we take feels like a brick wall. (Insert raised hand emoji). Its been a week full of Monday's and gaining speed. Staying positive is truly the most difficult task sometimes. Finding that silver lining seems impossible. Monday was surrounded by defeat from the time my feet hit the floor. Tuesday was a challenge with all the feels coming out. Wednesday started off strong then went down in flames. I got home, got dinner started, and the fight of homework ensued, and now its pairing a smart watch with an app that seems complicated. Heavy breathing, sighing, and choice words I check myself. I have an old friend in the hospital sitting alone, scared, and hurting. I have an old friend suffering through loss and the fear of starting over. I check myself and reach for my phone to text each of them. This overwhelming feeling of selfishness came over me for how I was whining and grumbling about my "bad" days. We all need to vent and get in our feels at times. Its human and healthy to an extent.

I sit watching my girl play with dolls now that the homework is done. I am fortunate to afford toys for her to play with. I look at my messy kitchen which means I got to cook a healthy meal for us. The pile of clean clothes on the love seat which means my house is full of love and adventures. (And dirt). We are allowed to feel defeated and have rough days. I tend to get overwhelmed in my rough moments but often pick myself up and find motivation for positive thinking. Life can flat out suck sometimes but I challenge everyone to get in their feels, have their moment, and find a purpose/person to smile. Deep breathe, good cry, and start again but remember not to unpack and stay there.